The Big B

I had an incident this morning in the line. A car cut in front of me, where there really wasn't room to cut, and I almost hit it. Maybe I even tapped it. I didn't honk, didn't make any gestures and didn't really have the energy to do anything at all.

A light flicks on; she's applying her mascara. Then the driver doesn't advance as the line does, allowing people to cut in front of them as well. This happens from time to time. People fall asleep in line sometimes; others are distracted by reading the newspaper, eating their burritos, etc. With a normal person, a little beep of your horn will wake them up, or snap back to reality, and they will continue on, trying to pay more attention. So I lightly tap my horn. Nothing. A car cuts in front of her. Another, slightly longer, tap on the horn. Two more cars cut in front of her. A long, determined honk of the horn, accompanied by an exasperated facial expression. Another car cuts into our lane and she adjusts her rearview mirror so our eyes meet, and I swear she smiles.

She carries on like this until just past the top of the bridge. I don't even consider touching the horn because obviously that will just encourage her. As soon as I can, I do my best to get in a different line than her and by the time I am a couple cars away from the CBP checkpoint, we are right next to each other. She waves at me and laughs hysterically. Then she nudges her daughter in the front seat, seemingly encouraging her to join in on the laughter. I see a car seat in the back and shake my head in disappointment. Although I cross before her (KARMA) she is driving so fast she manages to get onto I-10 before me. She weaves in and out of traffic, faster than an ambulance, giving no regard to the other cars on the road. Not once does she use her turn signals.

I'm not surprised when I realize we both have the same destination. I was going where everyone who crosses from Mexico in the morning goes beforework/school. Walmart. What else is there to do at 6:00 am? I park my car, still a bit disturbed, trying to contemplate the motive behind this woman's madness. I give up quickly, knowing deep down that she just did it for shits and giggles, and get out of my car. That's when I realized the nut job has parked right next to me. Did she circle the parking lot while I looked for my space? I don't even hesitate and hurry into the store. I return my movie to Redbox, grab some frozen crap for lunch and linger at the new Skinny Girl make up section wishing I could call Bethenny Frankel and tell her that as much as I love her and her margaritas, the brand doesn't work for a cosmetic line. It's turning out to be a regular morning at Walmart until I reach the produce section and I catch the crazed woman's eye. She's now in the store with who I presume to be her daughter, 2 sons and baby, filling up a bag with potatoes.

As soon as she sees me, she says to her children, in Spanish, "There she is kids! Say hi!" She nudges her son, "Wave to her!" she demands, while laughing so hard you would have thought she just saw Wanda Sykes perform. I stand there in shock. Not knowing what to do or say, I just stand there for a split second, replaying the whole incident in my head. Setting aside everything that happened in the line, I can't believe there were FOUR children in that car... weaving through traffic well over the speed limit like they were auditioning for Fast6. Who does that? Who behaves this way in front of their children? And that's when I let it out...

"Aren't you embarrassed?" I say in Spanish, "Why would you do something like that to someone for no reason at all? I ignored the fact that you cut in front of me in the line, but why would you continue to act like that, just to upset me? Why would you teach your children to be mean to someone, and then point and laugh when you are done?" I don't know why I was hoping for a different reaction, but I was.

"You're the crazy one who honked her horn like 10 times. What are you teaching your children?" she said. Her daughter looked completely mortified, and her two sons were edging away slowly in embarrassment. I just walked away at this point, muttering, "Que verguenza," under my breath and trying to block out her laughter.

These are the people. You know, them. When you wonder how some children can be so disrespectful and so hurtful to others, think of this woman. When you wonder why bullying runs so rampant in schools that kids post their suicide notes on Youtube, think of this woman. It is parents like these that teach these children that it's fun to mess with people, just because. And no, they're not teaching their kids with their words, but by their actions. It's so beyond unfortunate, I don't even know how to react.

At least now I know what that big red, Old English, "B" bumper sticker stands for on the back of her car.